Look Ma No Hands
a haiku with extra toppings
when they said to come
alone and unarmed, I thought
they meant 'weaponless'and I had no idea
they would consider my crab lice
to be companions, nor that the contest
involved a solitary armless masturbation
competition against the reigning champion,
"No-Hands-Clapping," a thoroughly
enlightened Zen monk
©2001 F.J. Bergmann
"Look Ma No Hands" appeared on Asinine Poetry